10 ways to not be a freeloader

1. If you are invited to a party, unless it is plainly stated not to bring something, bring more than you can drink. Parties are expensive, be generous and grateful for them hosting it. If you are going to drink 9 beers, bring 24. Its only about 10 dollars more than a 12 pack but it will make a priceless statement about the kind of person you are. If you bring just enough for you, you won’t be talked about when you leave but who wants to be “just enough”?

2. If you go to dinner with a group and the check comes don’t forget tax, tip and some extra. If the bill comes, someone pays for it all with their card and your steak was 24 dollars, giving even 30 dollars might seem like enough(or might even seem generous), but its not. 24 + 2.50 tax, 26.50 + 20% tip = $31.80, don’t forget you also ate some the cheese sticks, some of the nachos and took a southwestern egg roll, who do you think paid for that dickhead? Put an extra $5 in the pot to cover that, nothing in life is free so stop acting like it.

3. Going out. Its expensive, quit trying to make it cheap. Its like trying to find a Ferrari for $379 a month, its not going to happen. Shots are 8 dollars a piece, if we do 8 of them that’s 64 dollars plus tip, so 76 bucks. Ok, so now we are 5 minutes into a 6 hour night. We are drinking double crown and sprites, 16 dollars each, the girls are drinking cosmo’s 12 dollars each. Its going to be expensive, if you aren’t ok with that then don’t go out, it’s a simple concept. The worst thing you can do is do something that costs money when you don’t have any extra.

4. Bottle service at a club. I am thinking that maybe some people don’t understand how it works. Let me explain then you can no longer say “dude I didn’t know”. Its 300 dollars to reserve a booth and that comes with one bottle of grey goose(minimum 300). One person puts down their card, that 300 dollars gets put on their card and then anything ordered for the table after that is put on the card, plus tip. If there are 8 people there, the table will be 700 dollars after all the extras are ordered(minimum). Give whoever put their card down 100 dollars and don’t try to do the math and see if you were cheated or not. If you don’t have 100 dollars to spare, don’t go to bottle service booth night. It’s a simple mother fucking concept.

5. If you are on a date and you get the bill, don’t study it, put your card in and hand it back to the waiter. Do you think reviewing it is going to make dinner any cheaper, what are you looking for? Also you are taking attention away from your date to look for some unknown hidden charge on your bill. What? You cant believe dinner for two was 130 dollars? There must be a mistake? You should call the manager over and talk with him about it. While you are doing that, I am going to put my hand up your date’s skirt because you definitely aren’t going to.

6. Gas. Its expensive and as far as I know most trucks and cars run on it. I drive an 8,000 pound Avalanche. It costs 12 dollars to start it and 4 dollars a minute to run the radio. If we go on just a 2 hour trip my truck will use 22 gallons of gas to get there and back. At 4 dollars a gallon that’s about 100 bucks. Getting in a vehicle for a trip that you will enjoy requires a gas offering. Some might say “Well it doesn’t cost any more money with me sitting in the car”. You are right, but you are also a douche bag as of right now. Be nice, be generous, be considerate, help with the cost since you are enjoying it too, seriously why is that so hard to grasp?

7. Just because I make more money than you doesn’t mean I have to pay for more shit than you. Its not my fault you are 26 and work at the hardware store selling nails, your inability to maintain a good paying job is not my fault. So when the bill comes, we split it, 50/50 even if the bill is 87 percent of your net worth. I have been dealing with that concept since I was 16 and I am a little tired of it. If I take the bill and don’t give you the chance to split it, that’s an entirely different story.

8. If two of you go into a gas station, whoever gets to the register first needs to say “just put your shit up here too”. Worst case its ding dongs, a pack of gum and a coke, that adds a whopping 2.40 to your bill but gets us out of the gas station twice a quick.

9. If you bring liquor or beer to a party and don’t drink it all, leave it there. The rest is a gift for whoever held the party. Also, if you drink liquor at a party and just bring beer, remember the quote for the day, nothing in life is free, so someone paid for the liquor you are drinking. Either go to the store and get liquor or give someone some money.

10. If you borrow money from someone do not make them call you and ask for it back. That’s YOUR responsibility, you call them, you tell them when you are going to have it, you drive to their house and you pay them back. In the interim period if you spend money on luxuries when you owe someone money then you really need to examine yourself. When you owe someone money you don’t get to have fun until the money is paid back, why on earth is that so hard to grasp? Also, just because you cant pay it all back at once doesn’t mean you have to wait until you magically come across ALL the money to pay it back. If you owe someone 200 dollars, swing by and bring them 40 bucks a week until its paid off. Show the person that you appreciate their generosity and at least show them you are making some kind of effort to pay it back.

You know I think a lot of this comes down to people not having a lot of extra money so therefore they have to be tight with it when it comes to these circumstances. What I cant seem to grasp is, if extra money is tight why are you engaging in activities of luxury? I hear people say constantly, I am broke, funds are really low, money is tight this week. If that is the case why are you at a restaurant? Because you don’t want to miss out on fun? Guess what, when you don’t have extra money you have to miss out on fun, its called being a responsible adult. If you are having expensive fun without paying your fair share you are being a freeloader and even if you don’t realize it, everyone notices.

Luke

Popularity: 36% [?]